A note: This was written last Wednesday before our Paris trip where complete exhaustion from tromping all over the City of Lights with children made uninterrupted sleep a non-issue.
Day three of three hours or less sleep per night. This is not good. Here I sit on one of the kids' bean bags in the kids playroom at 5:45am. I have been awake since 2:30 and just now gave up the fight for sleep.
This fretful night I got the full onslaught of nature's call, leg cramps, hungry Morgan all one after the other between midnight and 2:30am. There's currently more than three post-it notes brimming with scribbles so I could "let go" and try to catch some zzzzz's. I was close to sleep at 4am when Easton woke up having wet the bed. Fabulous.
I tried reading which almost worked, although I'm to the part of "Life of Elizabeth I" where Mary Stuart, Queen of Scots is finally beheaded for decades of plotting against Queen Elizabeth. As I was dozing off, I turned off the lamp and closed my book which activated my brain. Oh why couldn't I just let myself doze off?!!! Then Ryan started snoring due to allergies and the game was up.
So what keeps me awake once I'm awake? Manic brain activity. I think of things to add to my To Do lists. Errands to run. Stuff around the house I want to conquer and how like an herb garden and more flowers, better filing system, clutter free drawers, fix the plugged-up kitchen sink, what to pack for Paris trip tomorrow! Stuff I'd love to blog about because I'm having clarity on a topic or two, or seven but I know my time today will be all too finite.
I think the greatest amount of my thoughts which also produces the most anxiety is how my mind drifts from person to person I know and love. People I really want to call or email to let them know I'm thinking of them, admire them, love them, have burning questions relating to their awesomeness. My parents, grandparents, other relatives, Ryan's family, old friends, new friends, personal notes I want to write to my kids or about my kids.
I think a lot about each of my brothers and sisters and their spouses. I want to know what they're up to because I love them so much and think of each of them daily. I'm so glad a few have blogs now and with Matt soon to go on a mission to BRAZIL, that means regular email updates from my folks! YAHOO!!! I'm so sad I'm going to miss Nick's wedding in August!!! Take a look at these family pictures: 2001, 2006 Reid family reunion, and last summer 2008 at the double reception for Brooks & John and Ben & Elizabeth. Man, we've grown! Ben was on his mission, but compare it with last summer!
We're all getting so growed up, it's amazing and so exciting to me! Soon six of us ten will be married! Chad and I both have three kids a piece now . . . anyone besides Chris and Tricia adding to the Bare Bunch??? Married college kids, a missionary, high school busy bees. I often think of where each of my siblings are in their lives, what I was doing/thinking/being challenged by at that time in my life, and what they might be up to now. Stop keeping me awake guys! Sheesh!
But someone I've thought of almost every day for months and months and months now is my Grandpa Bob. He's probably the smartest person I'm directly related to. I always want to ask him his opinion on this whole economic crisis although I don't even feel like I grasp it enough to ask the questions that will satisfy my desire to understand his wisdom. Since I listened to James Bradley's two books "Fly Boys" and "Flags of our Fathers", I've had so many questions I'd love to ask about this chapter in his life and how the WWII era affected him then and shaped him into who he has become. I'd like to know what it was like to live in DC around the Watergate era. I want to sit around and hear him talk about our family history work he has done so much of. How all the technology, politics, culture and what not have changed over the years and what he thinks about it all. The life he's lived has seen so many advancements and decay, I find it intriguing!
I want to say how much I love and admire who he is and how he is caring for the love of his life, my Grandma Honey. She doesn't quite know who he is all the time anymore which has made for some cute stories mom has told me of their conversations. How would it be to go through this? Ryan and I hope we're there for each other like this as we grow old together. Most of my favorite childhood vacation memories are of our visits to Tillamook. It will be a sad day when they leave that house of dreams (for a grand-daughter who doesn't have to keep it up and running), but I haven't been able to visit in forever and so much there has changed.
The memories will last forever and I'm so grateful for them! The tree swings, playing dress-up in the garage with cousins, walking to the bridge beyond the cow pastures, our salamander circus, forts in the woods, visits to great grandma Reid's picking berries or looking for beaver dams, being beaten at every board game by Grandpa Bob, driving to town in the Mercedes to the Tillamook Cheese Factory for ice cream, 4th of July fireworks on the beach, clam digging early in the morning - - it was so idyllic! Good thing I never really ran away from home because I would have landed on their door just begging to live on the porch. Don't worry, I'd have shared with the raccoons.
I love you, Grandpa Bob! Wish I could join everyone headed your way for the 4th of July!